


Sexrifice

by JadeTheThief



Category: Dice Funk Podcast D&D Campaign
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-17
Updated: 2019-05-17
Packaged: 2020-03-07 00:27:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18862033
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JadeTheThief/pseuds/JadeTheThief
Summary: The second in the Jade-fucks-the-Dice-Funk-horrors series, featuring Zavala.  Originally Zavala's dialogue was italicized, but that's been lost to formatting, it seems.  Hopefully still readable.





	Sexrifice

I cough, clutching my stomach as warm fluid seeps between my fingers. It hurts… oh goddess, why?

The gnoll looks strangely surprised and sad as she regains control of her senses. Fucking cunt. You murdered me! You—

I gasp, clenching my teeth as fire rages in my belly, a thousand severed nerves screaming at me.

It was just a little gold… surely they wouldn’t have missed it. The Blackhearts? The Scourge of Lorelei? Fuck, I got careless… Black specks fill my gaze as my vision grows blurry. It can’t end like this… It can’t. I’m so young…

Jaaaaaade~ a voice calls from behind my head, sounding cheerfully nonchalant. Still no last name? You’re throwing off my flow there.

“What the fuck…?” I sputter, aware that my words are heard only in this shared psychic headspace. Time appears to have frozen around us, yet an echo of my pain remains, reminding me of the fate that awaits.

You seem to be in quite a pickle, am I right?

“Who are you…?”

Oh, that’s not too interesting. Or important, really. You’ve got a bigger problem right now, and a better question to ask.

“I’m dying…”

Definitely. Not the first person to be eviscerated by Dr. Sherry either, I might add. Or the first I’ve saved from that untimely end.

“You can save me…?”

Of course, absolutely! Wouldn’t be here if I couldn’t! But… the voice loses its cheerful edge. There’s a cost, you see.

I sigh. Don’t really have a choice, do I? “…What do you want?”

Well, I have needs, you see. Being the metaphysical embodiment of Sacrifice makes my life a bit complicated. What I need from you… the voice moves closer to my ear, whispering intimately. Is for you to offer to give me anything.

“And then I’ll be your slave…?” I leer, quietly considering my options. Enslavement to an eldritch deity would destroy my freewheeling lifestyle, but so would death. Hmm… maybe I could escape later?

No~ the voice laughs, cutting into my thoughts. Slave? What do I need a slave for? My time on this plane is limited. No, what I need you to do for me will be simple and easy, but I need you to be willing to do anything.

I stare out at this moment frozen in time… I can’t escape this. I can only hope…

“…I’ll give you anything. I want to live.”

Excellent! The voice replies warmly.

I scream, head jolting back as the skin of my shredded belly stretches over the wound, weaving itself back together. The strange voice seems to loom over me, stroking the skin as it heals. See, normally I wouldn’t bother with something so petty as saving the life of a dumb thief who got herself killed, but like I said, I have needs. I shiver, feeling a cold hand slide under my shirt and paw at my breast.

“Oh goddess…” I whisper, heart beating faster as my thighs slide closer together.

You agreed to give me anything~ the voice chuckles. Well, I want to fuck you senseless.

I sigh and lay back, trapped in this timeless eternity until I carry out my end of the bargain. Damnit. “…Fine. Stick it in and get it over with.”

It? The voice laughs, a low giggle rising into a chorus of blurbling cackles. Strange, inhuman appendages crawl across my body, some rough and rigid, others smooth and slimy.

I tremble, turning aside as something wet touches my face. “W-what the hell are you?”

The cackling redoubles as I feel a body on top of me, shaking with laughter. A shadowy mass takes shape, starting as a humanoid blob of deep blue but slowly gaining detail. I try to struggle, but something pinches my arms, pinning me to the ground. Directly above my face, I hear a cacophony of flicking and snapping as the creature’s face becomes clear: a broken skull occupied by a single yellow eye, containing a sea of twitching purple tongues emerging from its unhinged jaw.

“Aaaah!” I shriek, closing my eyes as the tongues lap at my face. A clawed hand and a tentacle paw through my clothes, tearing them and ripping them away, leaving my naked skin exposed. I hazard a glance at the face and see the reptilian eye roll from one socket to the other, studying me intently. Oh goddess… what’s going through that eldritch brain?

Come on, I’m not that bad-looking, am I? It laughs, coughing through charred lungs. Flecks of spit fly from the tongues, splattering on my cheek.

“J-just do it…” I part my legs nervously. 

What’s the rush? It giggles, tongues lapping their way down my tits. My nipples tingle, aroused by the attention. You aren’t backing out of our deal, are you?

“N-no…” I sigh, laying my head back and lifting my hips. “Just bored with the foreplay.”

Oh? Well, in that case…

I gasp, feeling a tentacle slither between my legs and rub up against my pussy. Moaning softly, I arch my back and lean into the sea of tongues. “Okay… Mmm, more of that, please.”

See? This doesn’t have to be bad for you. The eye rolls playfully in the skull, looking amused.

I snort. “Shut up and lick lower.”

The tongues oblige, slithering down my belly and lapping at my clit. Squirming with pleasure, I close my eyes and try to forget the sight of the horrifying chimera, giving my body to the pure delight of receiving the best head of my life. I rub my nipples and moan as it brings me to climax, reclining limply as the entity rises above me again. 

Consider that a bonus on our bargain, the thing says with a smirk. Now, it’s your turn to pleasure me.

“Alright, alright…” I push off the ground, sitting semi-upright. “What do you want me to do?” I look over my dominator, feeling a mix of curiosity and disgust as I take stock of its various appendages. Skull, eye, tongues… burnt lungs, thick entrails, crab leg and claw, bird foot, goblin hand, tentacles… umm. “You, uh…” I tilt my head, trying to look around its other side. “Where’s your genitals?”

The creature snickers, eye flicking to the other side of its head. Everything I have was given to me by poor, wounded creatures. I didn’t want to shock you, but you’d be surprised how many times people call out to me to save their junk. The shadowy segments of its body shimmer, taking shape as an endless, writhing mass of penises in varying states of arousal.

“Ho… ly… Fuck.” I gape, shifting my elbows to keep from falling backward in shock. “I… I… uhh…”

The thing lurches toward me, members swaying and hardening. Well? If you want to live, you better get stroking.

I stare a moment longer, idly reaching a hand out toward the thing, too amazed and horrified to actually grab it. Thankfully (I think?) it took another step, dropping a hefty green penis into my waiting hand. I don’t know what species this came from, but if I had to guess, probably an orc.

Stroking my fingers up and down its shaft, I reached out with my other hand and grabbed another dong, rubbing both at once. The creature let out a low moan of appreciation, its many penises twitching in reaction to my touch. Smirking, I leaned in and kissed one, tasting a slight bit of precum. In response, the goblin hand took hold of the back of my head, encouraging me to go further, so I parted my lips, taking the member into my mouth. 

Sucking it rhythmically, I couldn’t help but laugh as a dozen nearby penises slapped against my face. It felt like I was pressing my face against a shag carpet of meat. Unfortunately, laughing with a mouthful of dick gave me a coughing fit, so I was unprepared when the penis unloaded a thick blast of cum into my throat. 

Pulling back, I coughed white globs onto the ground, still stroking the other shafts as best I could. A few of the more aroused dicks fired off as well, spraying white, goopy shots in all directions. I took a couple on my face and chest, then carefully started sucking another shaft. 

After a few rounds of this, the towering column of penises were more or less all erect, and I heard a low, eager moan emanate from their possessor. Too quick for me to react, the goblin hand grabbed my shoulder and shoved me roughly into the ground even as the tower collapsed onto me, thrusting itself up and down against the length of my body. I cannot even begin to accurately describe how it feels to have a thousand engorged cocks pressing down on you all at once like that, but… I’ll try.

Imagine a swimming pool full of fresh sausages, and you’re swimming at the bottom of it. You turn to look up, but before you can swim to the surface, a large body jumps in the pool directly above you, shoving the squishy masses of meat onto every inch of your body. It’s something like that. I think.

I think they may have penetrated me once or twice, but it’s hard to tell, and if they did, I’m sure it wasn’t the same one each time. I didn’t dare look, of course; they were pretty drippy already, and I knew it was only going to get worse. Eyes clamped shut, I lay still and waited as the thing thrust against me, over me, into me, until finally it exploded, shooting wad after wad of cum from every side of its body. 

It was then that I learned that the cum of different species had differing taste, smell, and viscosity. I couldn’t really separate them, since they all came out at once, but still, interesting trivia. Of course, at this point I was drenched, laying in a wet, sticky puddle, and rather glad to have the creature finally lift its mass off of me.

Thanks for that. The voice chuckled. I’ve been collecting those things for decades, and always wondered what it felt like to use one.

“Yeah…” I wiped my eyes and face, forcing my eyes open through a haze of stickiness. “And, uh, thanks for saving my life… I guess.”

Sure thing! Well, I’ll see you around, if you wind up on death’s door again.

Oh goddess. Please no.


End file.
